Wedding spirit is always sweet. The energy seems fresh and hopeful. After honeymoon, children begin sprawling everywhere, medical bills pilling on table and pressure from work and economic instability put your vows to test.
How to Be A Better Husband and Father After Honeymoon
Life is going to run so fast but you must maintain your cool. Few weeks or months after honeymoon, you may not recognize your wife.
Her tone may change, face may become aggressive than the innocent, pretty childlike woman you married.
Instead of trying to fight back, remain calm. This will let you know the right action to take to solve problems.
2. Friend not husband
The pressure accompanying husband can be intimidating, so, instead of trying to be a husband which you may easily fail at, become her best friend.
Just as friends share secret and their problems with each other, do same with your wife. Tell her the good news at work. Keep her close.
3. Too early to become abuser
I don’t mean to say you can turn abuser after two or more years. When you are married, you have a responsibility to protect your wife and children. Defend them and make sure no harm comes to them.
That is exactly what your wife and children will be expecting from you. Not turning into a wife beater. If you drink or smoke, try hard to control your emotion in case you cannot quit.
If there’s misunderstanding, don’t drive your wife and children out of the house late night or whichever time. This is actually not a solution.
You are the head of the family. Fortunately, we don’t have the tail of the family. Meaning, do not treat her as such. Respect her opinion and belief. By this you will both go far.
5. Do not fight, communicate
Fighting her shouldn’t cross your mind anytime in marriage. Instead, communicate all misunderstandings and grievances.
Anytime your wife upsets you and it’s hard to control your anger, seek asylum outside the house. Better still, take a walk. During day time, go to the farm. Don’t drive a long distance when too angry.
Listen to music, watch a fun channel, keep yourself busy. Remember, two wrongs don’t make a right.
Lead the way. Your wife wants you to lead her to the future. Even if you she has the money, you should assume the role of leadership to take the family to the promise destination.
Do not break her trust. Involving in stuffs which will lead to inconveniencing her will damage the relationship.
Showing appreciation in marriage is very important. Being it the husband or wife. As a husband, recognize the roles played by your wife.
Exercising self-control is very important as a husband. In marriage, your wife will definitely react to situations in unpleasant manners but you have to put a restraining order on your emotions.
Your wife and children will act out of character sometimes but you should be available to forgive and let the family move on as if nothing ever occurred.
You are the man of in the house, so you have to cultivate forgiveness for your children to learn from you.
11. Remain hopeful
Things will be difficult, there will be hard times, as a husband, it is important to remain hopeful. Learn to encourage yourself no matter the situation. When you lose hope, your house will be disorganized.
12. Love your wife as yourself
Don’t be fond of other people and make your home uncomfortable for your wife.
Love her as you love yourself. Doing so helps you provide her needs, communicate with her, and be patient with her.
13. Respect her parents and siblings
Treat your in-laws with respect. If you love your wife, you will respect her family members and make them happy.
Some in-laws can be a lot to take in, but it is important to respect them.
RELATED TOPIC: How to treat your in-laws.
14. Do not forget your anniversaries
Very necessary to keep special dates. Write them down so that you will not forget them. For example, your wedding anniversary, birthday, children’s birthday among other special days.
15. Do not exchange her position with other females or other things
When you love your wife, you will not leave home early to meet other women for unimportant matters.
Don’t bring a woman your wife is not comfortable with into your home. It will create problem.
Work is very important but you should also put your wife first.
She doesn’t want to be your afterthought.
16. Support your wife
It is very important to support your wife in her career and other aspects of life. As a good husband, be available to help your wife fulfill her dreams.
17. Pay attention
Be a good listener. You don’t have to always be the one making decision in the house or deciding things concerning the children.
When she wants to communicate, allow her and pay genuine attention. Run matters by her before taking major decision.
18. Keep wooing her
Before then, you read how to woo a woman and win her love. Marriage is a never-ending institution. There isn’t a professor.
You keep learning how to make a better husband, father and lover. You have to keep updating yourself with the knowledge to keep her happy all the time.
Go for marriage seminars together, update your skills to manage your home and keep things fresh and lovely.
19. Keep flirting
Remember how to flirt with your girlfriend? Very important even in marriage. You must keep the romance alive and new. Don’t make your marriage life boring and too serious.
20. Believe in yourself
No matter the situation, believe in yourself. Your wife and children need you to be strong and effective.
Coming home drunk for failure of securing a job will only throw your home in chaos. Keep on believing in yourself until you make it.
How to be a Better Father
1. Keep sex private
Make sure you avoid intercourse in their presence. Control your sexual appetite when they are around. Taking this for granted will destroy your children.
2. Sex education
Offer them sex advice as they age. Guide them through disturbing moments teenage life presents. Don’t be too harsh that they cannot seek refuge in you to tell you anything regarding their sexual life.
3. Provide shelter
As a father, provide shelter for your children. Also, buy them clothe and feed them.
A father’s responsibility is providing roof over the head of his children. You may not have it all before giving birth, but make sure they are not stranded.
4. Educate your children
Send them to school. See to it that they have good education. If you can help in their assignments, you should.
Provide all the text books required and other educative materials.
Follow up on them every term to know the teach-student relationship, how they conduct themselves at school etc.
5. Spiritual backbone
Grow your children in the spirit. Feed their spiritual needs. Take them to church and teach them the word of God.
If you happen to be a believer, do not abandon your children. Instill in them discipline, raise them to be God fearing.
6. Correct your children
Whenever they make mistakes, correct them gently. Shouting on them will only make them hide their errors.
There should be room enough for errors that they can learn and grow into responsible adults.
7. Be friendly
Even though there’s a need to create that gap, don’t make it become a barrier they cannot cross when they need you.
Just as you are the best friend of their mother, you should be their best friend that they wouldn’t be in search of friend and end up in bad groups that will cripple their future.
8. Help decide their career but don’t dictate
Guide your kids pick a career. Do not compel them to choose the type of work they will do.
Support them in their preferred jobs. If you happen to disagree with them, communicate it as a friend.
9. Spend time with your children
Because of work, some parents have to wake up at dawn and return when their children are asleep.
Having less time with your children disconnects you from them. Your wife and children need you.
Even though this is about fathers, our mothers should also learn to help the men to achieve these.
Without women showing support and discipline, it will be hard to have a peaceful home.
Husbands must make sure they do everything in their power to have a home they can come back to after work. Invest in your children. Love your wife. Build a happy home!
Lost Between Her Thighs
Between her legs, he invests his future.
He is a hard worker, sleeps little, eats little.
At the end of the day, he pours his sweat between her legs.
In the light of day, they go their separate ways;
while he fights to make enough to please her.
She walks the streets in mini skirt, slaying young hearts.
His money is not enough, and his sex is never satisfying.
He carefully schedules to meet her, leaving the wife and kids.
He barks as dog at home, and meow as cat at her door.
Early morning, he checks his account balance, and scream, “Lost Between Her Thighs!”.